Category Archives: BigFootZombie

BigFoot Zombie Shoots the Breeze

Bigfoot Zombie “Strikes the Pose” which is to turn his head toward the camera as through he’s just been discovered by accident but in is actuality is being sighted on purpose to perpetuate the myth.

It’s been a while since BFZ has let it all out in terms of what he’s been up to lately.  We caught up with Sasquatch Undead and he opened up to share his feelings about the pressures of being a topic of folklore.

I’m MM.

MM: First off, thank you sir for talking with us. I know you’re very busy with scaring tourists and all that.

BFZ: My job is not to scare tourists but rather I’m a Dream Peddler. I peddle dreams of scientific possibility. In truth science knows very little in relation to what it COULD know in 2020 if we weren’t on this path.

MM: What happens in 2020?

BFZ: We find out if science has any meaning anymore. Me and Lochy (Loch Ness Monster) were talking the other day about how times have changed recently. It used to be that there was a curiosity about spotting us and so on, but according to Marty (Martian) sighting opportunities of us folks have gone down 35% in the last few years. Now that’s scary!

MM: Yes. We heard you were concerned about the general perception of climate change.

BFZ: Yeah. If climate change studies are on the chopping block, what hope is there for interest in spotting folks like me and the gang?!


BigFoot Zombie Reveals How He Became a Mythic Legend

Let’s face it, BigFoot Sr. (Jr. doesn’t participate in “surprise” photos, he’s an accountant) has more traction and publicity than BigFoot Zombie does. Some speculate that BigFoot Zombie is both a Sasquatch and a “Night of the Living Dead Creature.” In short, many marketers agree that the reason BFZ is not as popular as BF is has to do with him confusing people. Is he a BigFoot or is he a Zombie? Agency folks have recommended that BigFoot Zombie make a decision regarding who he will do advertisement campaigns toward, will it be BigFoot Fan Clubs or Zombie Fan Clubs?  BigFoot Zombie doesn’t listen to the naysayers and has taken possession of building his own brand sans the “so called experts.” BigFoot Zombie sees himself being twice the draw instead of having conflicting image issues like the promotional camp asserts. So how did BigFoot Zombie manage to become a mythic legend despite the critics chopping down his approach? Simple. He combined his artistic side with his entrepreneur side and became an ArtisticPreneur. This way he had the passion of the artist and the business smarts of the entrepreneur. In other words he burns his own career path and has become a formidable force advocating for himself and telling his story just like the site ArtisticPreneur suggests. You go BigFoot Zombie!

Should BigFoot Zombie Become a Rock Star?

BigFoot Zombie
This is the classic BigFoot Zombie picture. Learn in this post the shocking truth behind how this iconic blurry image came to be.

To Become a Famous Musician or not to Become a Famous Musician?

Let’s face it. BigFoot Zombie would make a great rock star and he knows it. He’s never tried to become a music celebrity before because he never had the bandwidth due to his busy schedule and passionate commitment to keeping the “BigFoot Zombie” myth and legend alive by letting himself be “accidentally” be caught on camera in very blurry photos like the one shown in this post. And FYI the agreement between BFZ and the photographers of his pictures is that they must shoot photos that are blurry so that no one is positively sure BigFoot Zombie even really exists. It keeps the drama going.

BigFoot Zombie’s Big Issue of Pursuing the Career of Performing Tunes

BigFoot Zombie is in a quandary folks. Because of the blurry photos and film clips taken of him he’s already got the visibility necessary to piggy back it to become a vocalist as a solo career or even as the leader of a band. He can’t sing very well but that’s never stopped a lot of people from seeking and even achieving stardom. Here’s the problem though: he doesn’t want to do blurry music videos. He feels as an artist that appearing crisp and clear in his music clips  is vital because he has been learning the ancient Japanese art of Kabuki and for it to be fully experienced one’s image of it must solidly be in focus.

The History of Out of Focus Photos of BigFoot Zombie is a Family Affair

BigFoot Zombie is driven like nobody’s business to win a Grammy by the time he’s 61 years old. Reporters first began writing about him in October (the month of Halloween) 1958. The famous photo of him that we include in this article is actually that of his mother Matilda who was gathering grub for her son. Because at the time this picture was taken BFZ was just a cute little baby BigFoot Zombie , much too young to appear in intentionally poorly done images.

Putting Aside for the Moment the In Focus versus Not in Focus Issue Concerning Making Music Videos

Now putting the music video issue aside, BigFoot Zombie becomes determined to achieve fame in the music world. To do so he goes to two different consultants. The first consultant who is very “New Age” and “in the moment” as well as eats Vegan, gave BFZ this advice for becoming a rock star in 3 steps:

1. Smile.
2. Listen.
3. Be.

BigFoot Zombie Considers the Crystal Carrying Consultant’s 3 Steps to the Rock ‘n Roll Bigtime

BigFoot Zombie didn’t like SMILING, he was known as not being a good LISTENER (growling without really hearing the other person) and the “BE” thing really got him. When he asked the New Age consultant how to “Be” the suggestion was get into a meditative position and then to breath in and breath out listening to the breath. As we’ve already established BigFoot Zombie was not a good listener, not even of his own breath. So Smile/Listen/Be as the 3 steps to be just like KISS and Off Every Day (his two favorite bands) just didn’t feel right to the furry guy. Hence he sought out the 2nd consultant who promoted himself as being a “Realist not an Idealist.”

The Realist Consultant’s Feedback

When BigFoot Zombie told the Realist Consultant of the New Age Consultant’s suggestion to smile, listen and “be” this set off the second consultant who began to angrily rant:

“No. Not true. These are the real 3 REAL steps to become a rock star:

1. Make sure you have a self entitled personality and the outlook that everyone is wrong except for YOU.

2. Focus on that part of YOU that is childish and believes you’re entitled and deserving of whatever you want.

3. When you play your music YOU must believe to the core that it is not only better than anyone else’s but that anybody who doesn’t buy your tunes is a complete idiot.”

We Need Your Feedback

Which of the two consultant’s advice do you think BigFoot Zombie should take to become a Rock Star? Or should the living legend not even bother with a music career and instead focus (ironic use of the word) on what he does best, which is “getting caught” on camera? Let us know so we can pass it on to BFZ! Thanks!

UPDATE (Approximately 3 Hours Later)

Thanks readers for your highly valued opinions. It seems that the majority of you (93.3 %) are of the opinion that BigFoot Zombie in order to become a pop icon music artist should implement these three steps: “(1) Smile, (2) Listen, (3) Be.”

UPDATE (1 Day Later)

Bigfoot Zombie has taken the fans’ recommendation and is currently at a Yoga Camp somewhere in Madera County. He’s NOT under the spotlight yet but he IS eating vegetarian (he likes eggs too much to go Vegan right off the bat).